I remember so many good times with you and I still see you in my dreams. You always made me feel needed and understood.
Now that you're gone, it's silent. No one ever asks me how school
is going anymore or how work is going. No one asks me “How's
Jose”. No one calls me their favorite granddaughter, so I haven't
said “I'm your only granddaughter” since you passed. You always
made me feel included like when Cameron was learning to ride a dirt bike. You helped me learn how to ride, too. Before I started to ride dirt bikes, you bought me gear and asked me if I would continue to ride. I told you of course and I still want to, but I haven't ridden my dirt bike since the week you died. No one can fix my bike, but I know you would be able to. You would
let me sit in your lap and steer the mower when you were mow-
ing. You would sit with me and draw and do puzzles. You took me to the things you enjoyed just so I could hang out with you.
You would take me to the dirt bike track and let me watch or you would let me be in the garage to help you fix things.

 

I never really knew how many people loved you until you died or what you did in your life. I just always saw you as my grand-
father, my papa, one of my favorite people in the world. I knew
you were a firefighter when I was young but I didn't know how many lives you saved and helped. I knew so many people loved you but I didn't realize it ‘til they were all in front of me at your celebration of life. I saw photos of you that I had never seen before. 

 

So much has happened since you have passed. I have an amazing
boyfriend and am living on my own with him now. He became my boyfriend only a few months after you died. I would like to think you sent him to me. Every time you come into my dreams
you are always gone, but you come back for me. But then I wake
up and I'm still waiting for you to come back.